Cracks In Reality
by NessaYume
Summary: A commits suicide. B runs away. L is left alone again. But, how much is real, and how much is L truly losing his mind? How can he save B, if he doesn't even know if he can save himself?  L/BB
1. Chapter 1

A/N: My first multi chapter NON MxM fic.. Holy Jeevas! Lol. Ok, but this was begging me to write it.. It won't be too long.. It originally was going to be a one-shot, but I expanded the idea. Ok, so here is the deal.. Each chapter will start with a quote from a horror movie. If you can name the movie it's from, you can have a one-shot of your choice. There are people on 3 sites doing this. So I'll compare time stamps to see who got it first.

Summary: A commits suicide. B runs away. L is left alone again. But, how much is real, and how much is L truly losing his mind? How can he save B, if he doesn't even know if he can save himself? (L/BB)

Disclaimer: For the whole story, cause I suck and remembering to do this. I do not own L, BB, or any other characters. Nor do I own Death Note. I just came up with the twisted idea and borrowed them for my own fun to play with.

Warnings: Again, whole story cause I forget a lot.. Violence, Gore, Sexual Situations, Language.

**"****It's Halloween, everyone's entitled to one good scare."**

**It was his birthday. October 31, 2001. He was 22 today. For once, he was happy with his life. As a child, he had not known the love of a parent. Until Watari took him in. Even then, he was different. Smarter than the average child. He easily became the top 3 detectives in the world, using 3 different alias'. He had then started an orphanage with Watari. Headed by Roger, they used it to train his successors. In case anything happened to him, L would not die. L would never die. A and B were then brought in. But something unexpected happened..**

**..He fell in love with "B". His second successor at the time. Beyond Birthday. Was it bad? No, on the contrary. It was great. For the first time, L knew love. The love of a companion. A lover. And he was incredibly happy. Then things started to change on this particular birthday. Beyond was distant. His eyes seemed to grow cold. L tired to reach out, but to no avail. **

**(-line-)**

**L jumped as Beyond barged into the room, rushing around. He watched his lover questioningly, as he grabbed a few items.**

**"Beyond? What's the matter?" He asked. He shifted to step off the bed, away from his computer. Something his lover complained about regularly. His taking work to bed with him. Beyond stopped suddenly, and turned towards him. His lips were twisted into a sadistic smile. Suddenly, L felt himself being shoved hard against the door.**

**"I don't know." Beyond whispered in his ear, then licking the shell. "I don't feel right, L. I feel like there are bugs crawling over my skin. ****_In_**** my skin. In my brain." L shuddered as warm breath ghosted over his skin.**

**"Talk to me, Beyond. We'll figure out what's wrong. We can fix it." He tried to reason. The hackle that filled air stunned him. Beyond moved away, but he remained still, afraid as his lover folded into himself, his laughter growing.**

**"You think I can be fixed, L? And here, I thought you knew me." Beyond's Shinigami eyes locked with his own. In truth, Beyond Birthday scared L to death. The man knew his real name before he had even ****trusted him. He could easily ruin L's name with the truth and his own high IQ. But love blinded him to the fear for so long, and he was only now just getting a glimpse of why he should rightfully fear his lover. **

**"I do know you." He spoke softly. Timidly, to not startle his lover. Beyond's face turned serious, and his eyes pierced L's soul.**

**"What if I don't want to be saved?" He said before turning and walking out once more. L curled in on himself on the bed. His body shook as the cold settled in on him. The cold that had been installed by those menacing eyes. What was wrong with his boyfriend? How could he help him? **

**"L?" There was a knock on the door. Watari. "Are you alright? I heard yelling." He spoke, concern lacing his voice. L sat up once more.**

**"Yes, everything is fine, Watari. Thank you." He called back. He would get to the bottom of this. The whole situation felt so unreal. He felt like he was missing a part of a puzzle. Something so small, yet so significant. Determination set in. He would figure it out. He would not lose Beyond. **

**A/N: So, what do you think so far? I'm real excited about this one right now. It hits real close to home in my heart. I can't say why until the end though. 3 That would ruin it. **

****-edit- This quote was already guessed correctly from "Halloween" (1978)****

****I know, this one was easy. They should get better, and I hope to have multiple people, not just one. I don't want to do like 10 one-shots for one person. Lol. Good luck!****


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: SO.. Idk where you all expect this to go. But I do hope that you enjoy it. I'm certainly enjoying writing it! Lol. And with the mood I've been in.. This is being written easier.. Too many bad things happening. Enjoy!

Sarah: I look forward to writing more. 3 Lol. Hope you like where it goes. 3

Shaowdancer: I do plan to. I promise. I love them too. 3

Lawipop54: Thanks. Hope you enjoy. 3

**Chapter 2**

"**No tears, please. It's a waste of good suffering."**

L's determination only intensified as it seemed that Beyond's sanity was slipping more and more. He would find the man sitting in the dark, or before a mirror, just laughing. The laugh itself was menacing. Bone chilling. Where did the man he fell in love with. He knew A's death had hit him hard. It had hit them all hard. The pressures of becoming L was too much; too stressful. Was that what was wrong with Beyond as well? Was it his studies and pressure to succeed him?

He started looking into more orphans. Filling the school with kids that had above average IQ's. Though none seemed to fit what he needed quite yet. He stopped sleeping without his lover to hold him. The man he watched fade more and more as days passed. The holidays weren't the same. In fact, they were non existent in Wammy House this year. Not even Watari attempted to change that.

"What are you doing?" Beyond's voice was so distant. So different. His once warm and caring atmosphere was cold and detached. L looked up slowly from his computer.

"I'm trying to help you." He spoke low. Beyond's blank face twisted in anger.

"IT'S TOO LATE, L! You think you're so great, but you couldn't even save the one you claim to love!" Beyond's words echoed as he pushed the computer to the floor.

"I can't help it. I do love you. I miss you. You don't even come to bed anymore." L's voice was weak compared to his slipping boyfriend. Beyond's face relaxed, and he sat back on his heels. His lips slowly twisted into a menacing smirk, and L found himself pinned to the mattress.

"Is that what this is about? If I fuck you, will you be satisfied, then?" Beyond licked a trail up L's neck, biting so hard under his ear, he drew blood. L cried out in pain, and gasped for air.

"Beyond.. That's not-"

"Oh, so now you _don't_ want me?" Beyond pulled back and glared at his lover. A shadow of pain and rejection clouded his eyes. L gulped.

"I'll always want you." He said, hoping to calm him down. He soon found himself naked; shirt town from his form, and jeans down his thighs as he was flipped to his stomach. His hips were tugged upward to rest on his knees, and a searing pain shot u phis spin as Beyond pushed into him roughly. He cried out, tears coming to his eyes.

His body burned as he heard Beyond grunting roughly behind him. His own body started to react. Never in his life had he expected to find pain so.. pleasurable.. His prostate was being brushed with every thrust, and he found himself clawing at the sheets.

"Oh, God. More." His pleas contradicted the tears that ran down his face. He was so torn. He was trying to push Beyond away, but at the same time, he wanted to pull him closer. He found himself thrusting backwards, a hand reached up to grip the headboard as it slammed into the wall repeatedly.

L felt his skin rip open on his back and arms. Around his stomach and up his thighs to his ass. He felt the trickle of blood that Beyond left in the wake of his destructive nails. He heard Beyond start to pant and moan faster; thrusts more erratic. He closed his eyes as the body behind him shuttered and released deep into him. The feeling sent him over the edge, and he cried out the name of his lover before collapsing.

Beyond moved to the side, and lay on his back, and L looked at him. He looked so peaceful, yet tortured all at once.

"You should go clean up before bed." Beyond stated, his eyes remaining shut. L stood hesitantly.

"Will you stay?" He found himself whispering. Crimson eyes opened to reveal the chill they still help.

"I guess you'll find out, won't you?" Was the reply he got. L took a moment to look at him. He still wore his black long sleeve shirt. His jeans were open, and his flaccid cock lay out. It was covered in blood and semen, and he took a second to worry about the interior of himself. Tearing his eyes away from the site, he walked to the bathroom, and started the shower.

Fluids, red and white, ran down the drain. L hissed as he cleaned himself properly. It may not of hurt so bad, if he hadn't rushed the way he was. He wanted to get out before Beyond grew bored and left.

His efforts were futile, however. As he entered the room once again, he found it empty. He must have sent Watari in, because the sheets were fresh. He allowed himself a moment of embarrassment before the reality set in. Beyond had left. And judging by the clean sheets, he had done so instantly.

He barely made it to the bed before he crumbled into himself, the tears finally coming. How long he cried before he slept, he wasn't sure. Nor did he know how long he had actually slept. When he woke up, his eyes were heavy, red, and puffy. He sniffed as he looked around.

Getting up, he hoped to find Beyond somewhere. Instead, he found Watari in the kitchen.

"Watari, have you seen Beyond?" The old man looked at him, his eyes full of pain before shaking his head.

"L, Beyond is gone." He said. L stared back wide eyes. He had really left him? He turned and ran back to his room quickly. He had to find him. Beyond needed him. He had to save him. He couldn't slip away. He was all he had!

With renewed determination, L set to work, looking to find his lost lover.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Ok.. I'm sorry. I had to reread Another Note.. Lol. Plus, I only for sure have internet on Sat and Tuesday nights. Sucky, I know. BUT the new semester for me starts on Jan 23. I'll be busy with classes, but I'll have internet access every night. So, updating will get easier. I know the chapters in this story are relatively short, but I hope that they do what they need. I don't want to add too much excess, and I'd rather have a few shorter chapters, broken up right, than long ones that should have been broken.

"**I think we'll start with a reign of terror." **

**Chapter 3**

L searched all over for Beyond. He hadn't thought he would get too far so fast. But it hadn't taken long to figure out the man had left England entirely. He hadn't told anyone exactly why he buried himself into his work. He didn't think it needed explaining. Beyond being gone. That was obvious.

Watari generally left him alone. Just bringing him his regular cakes and tea. Not talking, just working. L sometimes caught the man giving him sad looks, and he ignored them. He wanted no pity.

They began to travel more. All around the world, L took high profile cases. He owned several safe houses across the world, and he started to take advantage of those.

"What are you looking for, L." Watari asked him one day. L looked at him as if he had asked the stupidest question. In his mind, he had.

"The love of my life, of course!" He had snapped. The worried look he received only angered him farther, and he dove back into the case he was working on.

March, April, May, and June all passed with nothing. No word or sight of Beyond. L had decided to take a case involving embezzlement in Los Angeles, California. The case was easy to solve, and it was then he decided to take a break. Perhaps he would never find Beyond. After all, if he didn't want to be found, he wouldn't.

July came to a close, and L didn't do much. He stayed away from his computer for once, and avoided the TV. He mostly sat up in his room all night, just existing. Watari brought food, and he barely ate. In turn, sleep started to take over more often.

Then, on August 13, he was walking through the house when the news broadcast Watari was watching caught his attention. Wara Ningyo Murders? That was odd for LA. It was then he demanded cake and tea in his work area as he sat back in his chair and booted up the long forgotten technology.

It was so easy to hack into the police reports. Even easier to use his resources to get the crossword they had ignored. It all came to him so fast. It was so simple. B was challenging L. But why? Is this why he left? L had always known that B wanted to surpass him one day. In fact, it was the only issue in their relationship. It put a wrench in the trust, therefore hindering the relationship. But L hadn't known that Beyond would rather surpass him than be with him. He had thought they were in love.

Perhaps it was whatever happened to him 9 months prior? When Beyond started to act differently? Was that what had caused all this? After L found no way to help him for 5 months, he snapped and left? He would have to capture him in order to find out.

On August 14, 2001, he contacted Naomi Misora. He knew Beyond would easily know she was his pawn. That he had answered the challenge. But it couldn't be helped. If he wanted answers, he would have to play by Beyond's rules.. For now.


End file.
